Marriage
f o u r  o b j e c t s

Maturity in both men and women is marked by the betrothal and then the wedding ceremony. The artifacts employed are of two categories: those that are common to a Jewish ceremony anywhere and those used according to custom in individual communities. All traditional marriages require a ketubbah. It is a document written in Aramaic, stipulating the rights and mutual pledges of the couple. It contains the husband’s commitment to respect his wife and to provide for her. It further makes provision for the wife in the event of the husband’s death or in the case of a divorce. The document is drawn by a scribe and often richly ornamented.

            Before the actual ceremony, the groom is taken to the place where the bride is waiting to make sure she is the right bride (refering to the story of Jacob and Rachel). She lowers her veil over her face for a ceremony known in Yiddish as bedeken di-Kale (covering the bride). The bride is then blessed by the rabbi or cantor, or in some communities by her father, who says “May God make thee as Rachel and Leah.”
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            The wedding ceremony takes place beneath the huppah, which symbolizes the future home. The wedding canopy can be fastened to four poles which are hand-held throughout the ceremony, or the poles may be fastened to the floor. The huppah may be erected either in the open air or in a synagogue. The first to enter the huppah is the bridegroom, accompanied by his parents, best man, and possibly witnesses. The bride, who must be veiled, is then brought by her parents and bridesmaids. In many ceremonies, she makes seven circles around the bridegroom. The ceremony does not have to be performed by a rabbi. The couple each takes a sip of wine from the kiddush cup. The bridegroom then places a ring on the forefinger of the bride, saying the ancient formula “With this ring you are consecrated unto me according to the law of Moses and Israel.” The ring may not be adorned with jewels and should have no openings. In some communities, it was customary to lend the betrothed a special ring for the ceremony which was adorned with a miniature house. The ceremony continues with the singing or reciting of the seven blessings and the couple drinks a second cup of wine together. In conclusion, the bridegroom breaks a glass under his heel symbolizing the destruction of the Temple, as Jews are to remember that even in the happiest moments of the life cycle the destruction of the Temple is not to be forgotten. Then, the congregation calls out “Mazzal tov” (good luck).

            Artifacts unique to particular Jewish communities include a ceramic plate that is broken by the bride’s mother in the company of both families to signify the engagement. Once again it is as a reminder of the Temple’s destruction. In Moroccan communities, containers for henna (red dye) are needed in the preparation of the virgin bride, as are sandals worn to the mikvah, the ritual bath in a bathhouse required before the wedding can take place. Additions to the bride’s dress might include a beaded head piece attached to the required veil, and a wedding girdle and/or belt buckle worn by both bride and groom. The traditional bridal dress will vary from country to country.